What is beauty?
It’s the age-old debate of what defines beauty, in
a society where looks determine everything, where do you think people with
disabilities rate in this? Why are they often pitied and looked down upon?
Well’s that’s what Shelly Baer is questioning.
At 3, Shelly was diagnosed with juvenile
rheumatoid arthritis, but she didn’t start suffering the psychological effects
of her condition until she had hip replacement surgery at age 14, which left
her needing to use a wheelchair.
Was she still considered to be beautiful?
Many years later, she came to a revelation that she was not an object needing
to be fixed, but a person with her own innate beauty. As a result, she went on
to establish her own photography program called Uncensored
Life, Raw Beauty, which aims to give those whose lives are touched
by adversity the push to fully embrace themselves, and in many cases,
conclusively accept who they are.
People with a disability have their own deep
inner-strength, which helps them show beauty in other ways such as kindness,
and selflessness, which is often undervalued compared to the visual component
of beauty. Why is that so? Parents have an important part to play in the
psychological development of how beauty is defined, positive thinking needs to
start in childhood. They should lead by example and instil that looks don’t
define your identity, and all parents need to teach their children the
difference between what magazines convey and what real life beauty consists of.
Dana Vulin was in the prime of her life. She had a
larger-than-life personality that struck whomever crossed her path and looked
absolutely gorgeous, when this kind-hearted beauty who also had a Bachelor of
Communications degree (majoring in advertising), was set alight in methylated
spirit by a jealous and paranoid ex-wife of a man who she briefly met.
Dana was just 25 at the time of the 2012 attack
and had endured burns to 64% of her body, had to be placed in an induced coma
in order to be kept infection-free and to also prevent her skin from getting
easily contaminated, and not for vanity. “What helped me get through this was
that I always loved and knew who I am and never really doubted myself.” She was
quoted as saying.
Although she was burnt on the outside, her spirit
on the outside was never broken and her determination shone through like no
tomorrow, making her recovery nothing short of incredibly inspirational.
As I’ve pointed out in previous articles, we are
not invincible as human beings because all of us are susceptible to the
unpredictability of life, when we get touched by adversity, such as cancer, it
can cause us to re-evaluate our perception of beauty. People can either accept
themselves or they can resent themselves and seek to change themselves through
options like plastic surgery.
So how can people touched by adversity justify the
need for cosmetic surgery?
I was touched by this very question myself late
last year when I took a really bad fall that left half my face was swollen and
mottled with different coloured bruises; gone were my right cheekbone and eye
socket, it had all melded into one blue-purple puffy pillow. This left me
questioning what was to become of my facial appearance. It wasn’t that I
changed my perspective on plastic surgery, I know inner beauty is more
enriching than outer beauty, but if my fall was to leave me disfigured I’d opt
for reconstructive surgery because I’d want to look as close to what I did
before. I’m comfortable in my own skin so I wanted to be helped by someone who
shared my belief as opposed to being just another pay cheque; I needed someone
to see beyond my external appearance in helping me.
I conclusively feel that the answers to our own
inner beauty are inside of us the way we each define it within ourselves
impacts the choices we make.
You’re welcome to formulate your own
opinion on these links: Shelly Baer's TED talk on http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xX1Job6O60E and Dana Vulin's story is on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjfYBGS18XE .
