Fighting Chance blog 8

Perfection of an unprovoked reality

I’m writing this article in response to a report that I saw on Channel 7’s Sunday Night, a story entitled “A father’s love”.

This report chronicles the story of a boy named Jackson Keleher who was born with Cerebral Palsy as a result of oxygen deprivation. Doctors said, quite adamantly, that Jackson would never ever walk and would be unable to lead a ‘normal’ life. As hard as this is for any first-time parent to hear, little did they know the power of parental love can create wonders and perform miracles.

Jackson’s parents David and Carrie separated not long after his birth and David became Jackson’s sole and primary carer. David was adamant that Jackson would walk and communicate, through means of gruelling physical therapy treatments and constant speech pathology sessions, an emotionally exhausting venture for both David and Jackson. Whilst I admire David’s bravery as well as his fierce fatherly support, the thing that got me talking most was Carrie’s response as to how she felt about Jackson having CP. Carrie is significantly less involved in Jackson’s day to day routine, although she says she loves him and is happy and proud to be his mum she finds the ‘CP part’ particularly hard for her to adjust to and accept, to the point where she referred to it as “repulsive”.

(I welcome you to watch the report and formulate your own opinion on 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBcKVASGdBs ).

While Carrie’s comments did initially make me cringe, as I was researching this story thoroughly and reflecting on her remarks, I realised that she has valid concerns and such denial and an inability to accept stems from enormous guilt and grief.

For myself I’ll always remain grateful for the life that I have now, if there was a safe cure for CP, would I take it? And my answer to that would be “yes” …….and “no”. “Yes” because I wanted to be a school teacher but I’ve struggled with people’s perception of me. And “no” because I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to meet the amazing people that I have.

Given that, I’d like to pose some questions to you, reflecting on unfortunate circumstances; if you could go back in time and change anything at all in your life, what would it be? And If you had a chance to live your life without unwanted and/or unnecessary challenge(s), would you and why?

Greg Braden once said and I share his sentiments;
“Adversity is an opportunity for us to step into our mastery.”

2012 Pink Ribbon Day

          I dedicate this article in loving memory of Janise Einfield, my aunty Mirna and to all those who have been affected by cancer.

In the USA and Australia, October is breast cancer awareness month and providing that, most Australians have been touched by breast cancer in one way or another. In fact, one in every nine Australian women will be diagnosed with breast cancer by the age of 85. As the number of women affected by this terrible disease grows, so does our need for your help and support.

That’s why the Cancer Council holds the event of “Pink Ribbon Day” which provides the perfect chance for you to do your part in the fight against breast cancer. There is a lot to be done, but we know together we can create a better life for everyone affected by this disease. So please, (heart) [shown below] pink or wear a pink-ribboned shirt brooch (shown below) this October and help us make a difference for all those affected by breast cancer.

It is therefore important that you all know that breast cancer can strike anyone at any age. In rare instances, even males can become breast cancer victims.

Back in 2006 when I was 17, I discovered a lump in my breast and as you can imagine, it scared the garbage out of me but luckily I acted quickly and sought medical attention. It turned out that the lump was benign but nevertheless I had it surgically removed just as a precaution.

I consider myself to have been lucky in that there was lots of media attention on the subject of breast cancer in young people.

Even though most doctors recommend that women undergo regular breast checks between the ages of 40 and 50, the experiences of celebrities like Kylie Minogue, 38, the late Jane McGrath, 42, the late Kerryn McCann (Australian Olympic sprinter), 41 and the late Belinda Emmett, 32 made me realise that it not only people aged 40 and up but young people as well.

The final message of this article is, get to know your bodies both anatomically and physiologically particularly the state of your breast health and if you notice any changes then please seek medical advice immediately. Who knows? It can either change your life and/or save your life.

Fighting Chance blog 6

LifeX

We believe that it is simply unacceptable that a significant portion of our community be excluded from actively participating in society because of their disability. Public isolation, loneliness and a lack of social opportunity is a far too prevalent and unnecessary challenge for Australians with disabilities. So what did we do..? We launched the Life X program in June of 2012, our aim, to make social inclusion a reality!

We run an annual calendar of events, from evenings at the pub and concerts through to weekends away, open to people with disabilities and our able bodied supporters. By doing so, we bring together young people who would otherwise never meet.

Keep an eye out on Facebook and Twitter for upcoming events, and get involved.

Our in-house blog writer Maria Makhoul comments on the Queen of the little monsters Lady Gaga, after attending her concert.

On Sunday June 24, some members of the Fighting Chance team, including myself, were lucky enough to go and see American pop star Lady Gaga at All Phones Arena, in Sydney as part of the Fighting Chance LifeX program.

While many people may classify her controversial stage presence along with her mildly wild personality and eccentric sense of fashion as perhaps not suitable to everyone else’s artistic tastes, on the flipside, her underlying inspirational message overshines that particular fact.

I think that going to this concert help us all connect with our inner wild child and it was a great night overall.

Attendees: Laura O’Reilly (Fighting Chance Australia CEO), Amanda Keegan (volunteer and Kellie Keegan’s sister), Kate Howard-Jones (former carer and HR staff member), Sophie Cooper (Georgia Cooper’s sister and volunteer), Kellie Keegan (current carer and HR staff member), Kylie Daily, Brianna Heaton, Georgia Cooper me, Brianna Azzopardi.

Fighting Chance blog 7

We’re not here for your inspiration . . . I politely disagree

Inspirational: Imparting a divine influence on the mind and soul.

Hi Readers,

I’m writing this article in response to an article by Stella Young that I read on ‘Ramp Up. ‘Ramp Up’ is the ABC website featuring news, discussion, debate and humour for everyone in Australia’s disability communities. Stella Young is a comedian, disability advocate and editor of ‘Ramp Up’. The article “We’re not here for your inspiration” criticises the use of images depicting disabled people doing ‘normal’ things captioned with inspiring quotes intended on encouraging ‘non-disabled’ people to put their worries into perspective, of which Stella disapprovingly labels “inspiration porn”.

In my attempt to respond to her, I’m going to do my very best to advise her to lighten up, encourage her to tone her criticism down and show her that there’s nothing necessarily wrong with being ‘teachably’ inspiring towards others in my similarly entitled blog “We’re not here for your inspiration…I politely disagree”.

I was born with a moderate type of cerebral palsy which means that while I am able to walk using mobility equipment to support me with my physical balance issues, I use a wheelchair for long distances because I get tired. Because my CP is moderate, I sometimes feel reluctantly lucky that I can do the things I can, but despite that, my parents always insisted that I treat myself the same way as everyone else and conduct myself with complete normalcy (whether it’s with your attitude and/or your physical capabilities). So far most of the people that I’ve come across have been encouragingly kind and pleasant towards me.

Although people with a physical disability (like myself) might be doing completely ‘normal’ everyday tasks as Stella so defensively points out. These tasks are in fact challenging for those of us who do not live in a ‘normal’ functioning body. So what then is the dispute over recognising this feat as inspirational? I would argue that to be inspirational one does not need to be extraordinary, rather one can be simply ordinary but in extraordinary circumstances.

As anyone who has a disability will know, growing up can be a real roller-coaster ride. Often you have to search far and wide for inspiration about how you can make your life more meaningful and achieve a sense of purpose and fulfilment. For me, it’s the feat of overcoming obstacles and achieving against the odds that is inspiring, individuals achieving their goals no matter how big or small.

I would argue then, that a photo of a famous athlete with the slogan “you can do it!” “find the power” is no more or less ‘appropriate’ than a picture of an amputee walking on prosthetic legs with the caption “before you give up try”. With the permission of the individual in question how can it be suggested as abusive or disrespectful to advertise ones triumphs in the hope of inspiring others? We all need a little motivational reminder every so often this hardly denotes ‘inspirational porn’.

So, Stella, if you disagree I hereby pose a question: What and/or who would you personally and specifically identify and/or classify as an inspirational person to you?

Maria Makhoul – Fighting Chance in-house blog writer.

My family musician Toni Makhoul

Please note that I do wholeheartedly respect, appreciate and love all types of music (even though as a child, I hated classical music because it made me cry).

Given that, for me, my notion of “music” came in different stages.

Firstly, throughout my childhood, my introduction to it was solely about me liking an artist(s) and/or music band(s), wanting to buy their album and have as many favourite songs of theirs as I wanted. Then, when I moved to Lebanon with my family in December 1997, I got to know the rest of my relatives better and as I got to know my paternal uncle; I soon discovered that he was a musician and a really talented pianist but at the time, it was just a hobby and passion of his that was heard nearby particularly when he played the piano.

Then by my teenagehood, I started discovering different music genres, different musical rhythms, chants, melodies and harmonies and better understanding them in terms of their tune.

I then starting paying more attention to the structure and rhythm of my voice when I sing...and then I discovered that I had a reasonably good singing voice and I could sing, but I unfortunately can’t have singing as my chosen career path because I have a mild speech impairment that sometimes affects my breathing when and/or while I talk, so I just casually sing alone sometimes. I’d like to take singing lessons one day. My personal music motto is: “You’re never too old or too young to go ‘retro’” because I got into the 80s music when I was 16 in 2005.

By my adulthood, I then started paying close attention to the lyrics of my favourite songs or new songs that I hear and I guess the reason for this is because, when I was growing up, I spent most of my childhood reading books, reading dictionaries, playing educational computer games and writing in my diary/journal which now enables me to incorporate music into my writing articles, with one exception though: because I’m not a singer, I’m therefore not able to say to my readers: “This is the perfect song for you to listen to” because it’s unfair for me to do that as everyone has different tastes when it comes to music and singing but what I can say instead is: “I can relate to this song because...(and state my reason for it) or “I really love this song because I can relate to its lyrics” or “The lyrics of this song make me feel...(and put whatever emotion that you may feel about it).”

My paternal uncle Antoine “Toni” Makhoul is a music composer, arranger, and producer. The genre of music that Toni likes to create and play is a light jazz and pop instrumental. He just likes this kind of music and he thinks it is the best way to talk about emotions and love. It’s commonly heard when you are feeling bad and/or when you are feeling happy and when you are in love and/or when you left your lover. He thinks it is the music that has the most common emotional areas and this will make it universal and acceptable worldwide.

You’re welcome to check out his work on his website www.tonimakhoul.com or his Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/ToniMakhoul .

As his niece, never in a million years did I ever think that I’d be living on the other side of the world writing music press releases to promote my paternal uncle’s work which has been a dream come true for me because I’ve always loved music and wanted to somehow explore it further.

I come from an article/story writing career background but I’ve always wondered how people “song-write”. See, for me, as an article/story writer; I sort of see writing as similar to acting, the only difference is that with acting you need costumes, props and to read off a written script to help you get into character whereas with writing you need the research and/or verbal communication between, on and/or about the subject that you write about; to help you get into character in order to be able to write a good article or story. So I was wondering whether or not “songwriters” have to be in a “songwriters’ zone” and get into “character” in the same way that normal and/or other “types” of writers have to in order to write a good song.          

In concluding this article, I’d like to say that writing it has been so much fun for me and I’d like to thank my paternal uncle Antoine “Toni” from the bottom of my heart for trusting me to write this which I’ve thoroughly enjoyed doing. I’m so proud to have both the arts of music and writing running through my paternal family genes because I feel that writing this article has given me the opportunity to combine both my knowledge and love of music and writing into it and I just hope to do and serve my uncle justice with it.

Written by niece Maria Makhoul

We're not here for your inspiration…I politely disagree” (Maria Makhoul's version)

Inspirational: Imparting a divine influence on the mind and soul.

Hi Readers,

I’m writing this article in response to an article that I read on the “Ramp Up”. “Ramp Up” is a disability advocacy blog run by journalist Stella Young.

Stella Young wanted to be a secondary school teacher upon finishing school but had to re-evaluate her options because she discovered that some of the schools in her area were wheelchair inaccessible.

I’m sure that that’s happened to all of us at some point but she’s written this blog entitled “We're not here for your inspiration” and when I read it I thought she was being strictly critical and closed-minded in her viewpoints. You’re welcome to read the actual article and judge for yourself and formulate your own opinion on it on http://www.abc.net.au/rampup/articles/2012/07/02/3537035.htm .

In my attempt to respond to her, I’m gonna do my very best to advise her to “lighten up”, encourage her to tone her criticism down and show her that there’s nothing necessarily wrong with being “teachably” inspiring towards others and having that very attribute recognised in return by the person saying it, in my similarly entitled blog “We're not here for your inspiration…I politely disagree”.

My name is Maria Makhoul; I work at Fighting Chance Australia with the O’Reilly family as a "new media and research assistant/in-house blog writer". I was born with the moderate type of cerebral palsy which means that while I am able to walk using mobility equipment to support me with my physical balance issues, I use a wheelchair for long distances because I get tired. Because my CP is moderate, I sometimes feel “reluctantly” lucky that I can do the things I can but despite that, my parents always insisted that I’d treat myself the same way as everyone else and conduct myself with complete normalcy (whether it’s with your attitude and/or your physical capabilities) and so far most of the people that I’ve come across have been encouragingly kind and pleasant towards me.

What is important for us to note is that people with disabilities and/or people who face other life challenges are also human beings who have emotively kind hearts that have the capacity to love, support and encourage others just like able-bodied people can and do which oftentimes is kindly recognised and complimented by strangers. The reason as to why I state this is because, in her article, Stella has bitterly and critically suggested that the “inspirational” attribute that lies in one’s personality be ignored and preferably abolished…which I highly disagree with because it could have many goods to it.

Now I’ll go on to address the subjects of role models and inspirational* people.

As anyone who has a disability will know, growing up can be a real rollercoaster ride. Often you search far and wide for inspiration about how you can make your life more meaningful and achieve a sense of purpose and fulfillment.

I’m sure we all have role models and inspirational people that we admire and look up to and oftentimes we all have that one person that stands out from the pack. Because I’ve faced challenges with this “role model choosing” element when it came to other people’s perception(s) of them, I feel wholeheartedly confident that I have the right ones for me so far which is why I’ve compiled some questions to help guide kids and/or families on how to support themselves in making a suitable decision that best fits them.

Questions:

1.  In your opinion do you think there’s a difference between having the “stranger danger” talk and the “role model(s) choosing” talk with your children? If so, then please explain why and/or how.

2.  How do you explain the difference between “being a follower” and “being a leader” in a grounded way? Example 1: How do you articulate to your child that there are some times in life in which you can’t be “enslaved” into doing what others want from and/or of you and that there are other times in life in which it’s okay to follow someone depending on how valid your reason for doing so is? Example 2: How would you help your child deal with their own self-comparison issues? For instance, if your child said to you: “Mummy, I really want and/or wish that I could be like this person” or “If it’s okay for this person to do this, then how come it’s not okay for me to do it?”

3.  Did you have “role model” guidelines for your kids, growing up? Example: if your child chooses to have someone that they personally know as their role model then you’d have to oversee that there is a level of trust that is and/or gets demonstrated between both your child and their chosen role model and make your final decision on it depending on how you feel about it; whereas if your child chooses to have a celebrity as their role model then you’d have to ensure that they (the celeb) have good and positive attributes that your kids are likely to draw inspiration from and/or be influenced by.

4.  If your child has a celeb role model then in your explanation, how do you separate the “personal humanitarian” part and the “showbiz and fame” part? Example 1: Just because the career industry that we choose to work for requires to do weird, whacky and crazy things, it therefore may not necessarily mean that that’s who we are in real life. Example 2: despite their “celebrity status”, life for them just goes on as it does with everyone else because they are also everyday regular working class people that have their own personal lives to live and lead.

5.  How do you convey the right “role model” message continuously in a grounded way, even if and/or when the conversation gets too obsessive and/or over-obsessive? Example: If you notice that your child is getting too absorbed in the conversation to the point where one feels that they have nothing else to talk about, you might say to them: “While you personally may like this person very much, it doesn’t mean that your life hereby* has to revolve around you talking about them at irrelevant time.

6.  Did you use your own “role model” knowledge and/or your parents’ wisdom around that very subject to help guide your own kids through the “role-model-choosing” journey?

7.  Did you have role model(s)? Who did you look up to? And why?

8.  When you come to a point where you trust your child's "judgement of character" when it comes to their "role model choice", how do you then help them defend themselves against ruthless criticism?

9.  How do you explain the difference between “being a follower” and “being a leader” in a grounded way? Example 1: How do you articulate to your child that there are some times in life in which you can’t be “enslaved” into doing what others want from and/or of you and that there are other times in life in which it’s okay to follow someone depending on how valid your reason for doing so is? Example 2: How would you help your child deal with their own self-comparison issues? For instance, if your child said to you: “Mummy, I really want and/or wish that I could be like this person” or “If it’s okay for this person to do this, then how come it’s not okay for me to do it?”

10.                    Did you have “role model” guidelines for your kids, growing up? Example: if your child chooses to have someone that they personally know as their role model then you’d have to oversee that there is a level of trust that is and/or gets demonstrated between both your child and their chosen role model and make your final decision on it depending on how you feel about it; whereas if your child chooses to have a celebrity as their role model then you’d have to ensure that they (the celeb) have good and positive attributes that your kids are likely to draw inspiration from and/or be influenced by.

11.                    If your child has a celeb role model then in your explanation, how do you separate the “personal humanitarian” part and the “showbiz and fame” part? Example 1: Just because the career industry that we choose to work for requires to do weird, whacky and crazy things, it therefore may not necessarily mean that that’s who we are in real life. Example 2: despite their “celebrity status”, life for them just goes on as it does with everyone else because they are also everyday regular working class people that have their own personal lives to live and lead.
12. How do you convey* the right “role model” message continuously in a grounded way, even if and/or when the conversation gets too obsessive and/or over-obsessive? Example: If you notice that your child is getting too absorbed in the conversation to the point where one feels that they have nothing else to talk about, you might say to them: “While you personally may like this person very much, it doesn’t mean that your life hereby has to revolve around you talking about them at an irrelevant time.

13. Growing up, did you use your own “role model” knowledge and/or your parents’ wisdom around that very subject to help guide your kids through the “role-model-choosing” journey?

I have a few role models: Fran Drescher, Kris Jenner (Kardashian family mum - please note that I understand that everyone has their own opinion about them and that’s ok but even though I read her book “Kris Jenner and all things Kardashian” as an adult, in hindsight I sort of wish that it was around when I was growing up because you could learn lots of valuable lessons from it so you can read it if you wish) and Sharon Osbourne but there’s one person that stands out from the pack for me…that is 2005 Australian Idol contestant, turned singer/songwriter and youth and crisis worker James Kannis because he’s a positivist* who inspires me and helps me a great deal to always stay positive. Even though I have been lucky enough to have met him and his family and am now friends with him, I’ve sometimes had to “politely disagree” with him as to why he finds me an inspiration, the realisation of that came to me when he said to me: “Maria, there are people out there who take things for granted, and to see people like you that are so alive and motivated despite the daily challenges that you have to go through, is an inspiration to me", which completely resonates with me.

So, here’s my advice on what to look for in role models and inspirational people:

·        Follow your heart and take your brain with you.

·        Look for someone you can relate to and who you feel reflects your personality best.

·        Depending on if you feel comfortable and confident about them being your role model and/or inspirational people then sometimes you may feel the need to treat the experience and/or the person like a counsellor.

·        Look for someone who’s “critiquingly nurturing”* towards you.

·        Look for someone who embodies these attributes: respect, realism, humbleness, honesty, truthfulness and openness.

·        If you need a different perspective on things then don’t be afraid to enlist the help of the opposite gender for help.  Who knows? You might be surprised.

The bottom line is that you can have as many role models and/or inspirational people as you wish for they can absolutely change your view on things and even your life.

So, Stella, I hereby pose a question: What and/or who would you personally and specifically identify and/or classify as a role model/inspirational person to you?

Positivist: [Adjective] - 1.The state or quality of being positive. 2. Of or relating to positivism; "positivist thinkers"; "positivist doctrine"; "positive philosophy".

“Critiquing nurturing”: A term that I came up with to describe someone with a kind and loving heart and/or personality who’s also able to give and/or convey “tough love” when required.      

The Ultimate Parental Struggle for Mainstream Education and Schooling

It is often agreed upon that knowledge is power; as such getting a good education is very beneficial to setting one up for life, right? But if you’re a parent of a child with a disability; what would you do to help them navigate their way through the challenges of mainstream schooling? Well, for my latest blog I present two brave mums, Rima Shah and Nikki Ashton as they candidly voice their opinions on the issue of bullying. Both mothers took the opportunity to open up about the social challenges that children with disabilities may face in school environments.

While neither Rima nor Nikki had significant apprehensions about enrolling their kids into mainstream education, they both agreed that bullying was an issue of considerable anxiety. Arguably I’d suggest awareness is, and always has been the key, and where better place to start than in the classroom-the very place where one starts their educational journey. I suggest (having gone through mainstream schooling as a person with special needs) that ‘Inclusive Education’ would be a useful competency for those along the teaching spectrum.

When discussing her son Nikki Ashton noted;

“When Ben was in year 9 he was bullied by a group of 4-5 boys. The school asked me to come in and talk to them about Ben’s challenges, and educate them on CP. It was a successful strategy and they ended up being friends with Ben.”

Could we propose that the reason as to why people bully others is simply a symptom of ignorance that can be minimised or avoided with education and understanding of the individual circumstances of others….?

On the topic of inclusion and healthy interaction Rima Shah raised similar concerns about her son;

“I think it takes time for kids to accept a child with special needs. Given the right school environment this can be made easier but you will always have bullies that create trouble. Education of disability helps to minimise this. Most boys at the age of ten want to run around with their friends. Aaryan cannot do this–so he often struggles to [participate] at lunch time.”

While the subject of disability can sometimes be viewed as a taboo and a stigmatised topic of conversation, the need for education on it in our society has become a never-ending subject that is often spoken about in and of itself. but let me tell you that as I was writing this article, I was shocked and equally surprised at the fact that it is and/or can often be an issue for people to understand, perception-wise...even in the school classroom…the very place where one starts their educational journey.

‘Inclusive Education’ is an optional elective subject available for those studying Education at University which equips individuals with the knowledge and skills they need to confidently and comfortably engage students with a disability. Reflecting on the comments made by both Nikki and Rima, a case I believe, can most certainly be made that ‘Inclusive Education’ become a required competency.
 
If one argues the expense of mandatory ‘inclusive education’ training, it’s hardly comparable to the price paid for ignorance….

Fighting Chance blog 5

The value of working hard NOW Friday, 16 March 2012 01:40 “Death is very likely the single best invention of life. It is life's change agent. The benefit of death is you know not to waste life living someone else's choices. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition." Steve Jobs, Apple CEO 1955-2011. “Every death in one’s family poignantly conveys a message to their loved ones to live life more fully, presently and in the now”. Oprah Winfrey, American TV show host. “Love your family; try to do as much as you can. I think that’s why I’m always trying to burn the candles at both ends now. I want to be there for my family and for my loved ones, and if somebody needs me or wants to be with me, I feel really bad or guilty if I can’t be there for them”. Kris Jenner - Kardashian family mum, American TV personality, producer and author. Hi Readers, First of all, let me give you some personal background on the three people quoted above, all of whom are “visionaries” in their own right and own way. After being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in mid-2004 and not knowing how much time he had left to live as a result of that, the CEO of Apple Steve Jobs was somehow, I believe, “inspired” by that very fact to use his experience to share some insight with his fans and followers about how to wholeheartedly continue living your best and fullest life, in your own way, even in the very thick of adversity. The comment by American TV show host Oprah Winfrey was made when Canadian country singer Shania Twain was on Oprah’s show promoting her autobiography “From This Moment On”, after Shania expressed her sadness at losing both her parents in a car accident in 1987. The reason I quoted these three people is because I believe their words are perfectly relevant to this topic: The contrast of life and death. Parents often tell their kids that life sometimes and/or often isn’t delivered to us on a silver platter and often try to instil the “value of hard work” lesson in them; that they could have and do anything they want, as long as they work hard to obtain it and/or achieve it, which is a good lesson to impart.  I would happily welcome your feedback on this issue. But in this blog post, I’d like to pose these questions to my blog followers from two different perspectives, both from parents and individuals: Questions: 1. How do individuals find the right balance in life in relation to the difference between the “value of hard work” lesson, versus the “making the most of every growth opportunity that life may throw at them” lesson? 2. How do parents manage to find the right “balance” between, on one hand, instilling the “value of hard work” lesson in their children, while on the other hand also helping ensure that they make the best of the growth opportunities that life may offer them, even if that might include them pursuing their own leisurely dreams, likes and/or goals? 3. As an individual, how do you manage to live a “balanced” life that includes both the lessons listed above? Throughout my life, I was raised with the “value of hard work” lesson instilled in me and for most of my life that was pretty much how I operated. As I look back on what my life was like, growing up and having “the value of hard work” lesson instilled in me, I also now realise that for the past six years, both life and the universe were trying to wake me up to the fact that sometimes in life, there is never gonna be a right time to do anything that you intend on doing. If there was something I wanted to do, then I should go for it and not give up on it. Personally I can’t understand how this particular theory works but it does, and for a very good reason and that’s because as life runs its course it can sometimes take us on an unpredictable and emotional rollercoaster ride. I guess the most common mistake that people make who were raised with the “value of hard work” lesson, myself included, is that they “make” and let their whole lives revolve around it and make decisions around it; which is sometimes wrong because in hindsight, you sometimes might have allowed yourself to miss out on what potentially could have been an “interesting growth opportunity” to learn from, without even knowing it. The reason I quoted American TV personality, producer, author and Kardashian family mum Kris Jenner is because, let face it, we’ve all been there or have had to go there at one point or other countless times in life, and I think this particular quote is so relevant to this topic and will deeply resonate with readers. For me personally, I’ve always been a hard worker my whole life and I like doing things that can take me on a personal learning curve, but over time I’ve now also learnt how to enjoy the life moments and make the best of every opportunity given to me. But it took a few harsh “wake-up calls” to get me there. For me unfortunately, lightning did actually strike twice: first, it took a major personal health scare for me to finally realise that there is never going to be a “right” time to do anything that I intend on doing, particularly when it came to pursuing my dream of meeting my musician role model; and secondly, when my beautiful work family unexpectedly lost their beloved son and brother Shane O’Reilly last July, aged 21. Even though I personally never got to know Shane, his death taught me that NOW is the time to live, pursue my dreams and do whatever I like whenever I like to do it - because you never know when your last day is going to be. I write this article in honour of Shane and the three people that I quoted above.